Reason Why I Have ‘Trust’ Issues- Nauman Ali Khan

The recent hurdle of events has pushed 2 different incidents to the surface. One had been discussed earlier in the blog while the second one is being discussed today. This is not going to be ‘how people reacted’ to the entire ‘Ustaad’ NAK event but what I personally experienced through it, as a person.

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Ustaad Nauman Ali Khan- CEO and Lead instructor Bayyinah

The incident didn’t come out to be a shock to me. Not that I was expecting something similar from a religious celebrity (would consider him one, based on his fan following) but because I hardly tend to trust anyone. There’s no hard and fast rule, as to WHY I end up doing that. But, let’s just say I have had enough of a share to make it a general practice. More common belief could be that I don’t trust myself of being able to behave in a fixed manner and thus, I don’t commit to a single opinion about the rest.

 

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Bayyinah.tv one of the more means of his religious speeches

To get to know of a ‘religious’ celebrity practicing ‘girl-hoping’ might not be something new and it definitely wasn’t unexpected. His bayans (a couple that I heard while aimlessly refreshing my social feed), his way of expressing religion was more of like a story-teller narrating a fairytale rather than trying to explain why and how certain things work in Islam. Religion for me is a path to be followed and not a story to be memorized and getting entertained by. Nonetheless, new age, new ways!

 

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This whole scenario keeps on building the ‘I have trust issues’ case study. This also happens when you get to meet a lot of people and tend to know a lot of weird things about them. Most often you can confront them and the rest you have enough ‘red-handed’ proofs to accept without question. It’s a small, small world and people actually talk so chances are people really know a lot about what you’re hiding. This might be a controversy, someone trying to fabricate this all. But why would anyone use this particular medium of women, affairs, or money? Why couldn’t it be something else? I’m no one to give my 2¢s on it but that one should never rely on anyone to the extent that one should take them to be spiritually correct, all the time. Humans are but animals molded and shaped out of elements with the power to make mistakes and learn from them. As part of this world, be able to know the lies that can be fabricated in the finest of gold sheets.

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P.S: I have nothing to do with NAK incident nor do I have the energy to make it a topic of debate. This incident just brought light to something that I personally go through, every day.

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Mahira Khan just experienced a ‘Loug Kia Kaheyngay’ Moment

The ever famous meme claims that infinite dreams of desi-children have been crushed under the hammer of ‘Loug Kia Kaheyngay (what will people say). Lesser do parents know, whatever your child ends up doing, you can never save them from the unconditional trolling and attention of the haters. Be it phopho, phopho ki beti/beta, their EX, or a close friend.

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But what exactly is this ‘Loug Kia Kaheyngay’ phenomenon? It is a normal social practice that moves within the lower to upper middle-classs households of the South Asian society where parents let down their children from living a healthy and free life with the aim to do something and achieve a place in life where they feel comfortable about themselves and attain a sense of pride. But what happens in reality, is that the parents pressurize their kids not to move forward any further in their desire to pursue their dreams since it is not according to the ‘prescribed’ model of the society. Let’s quickly evaluate a very recent incident with the perspective of ‘Loug Kia Khayengay Phenomenon’ and see how well we can understand it. Famous drama and film actress Mahira Khan who shot to fame with her drama Humsafar, even won hearts across border with thousands of Indians all over her performance in Raees. Nonetheless, Mahira had been our Queen since years now, actresses, her fans, male colleagues all go over, praising her for who she is and how she appears so flawlessly on-screen. Her recent paparazzi incident has bombarded the internet overnight, showing Mahira having a smoke break with famous Indian actor Ranbir Kapoor. Why not quickly list down the ‘haw haye’ factors in the image attached below:
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a) Wearing a short skirt
b) Backless and deep neck
c) She is freaking smoking! (that just broke the ‘haw-haye’ scale on the internet)

Debating over the double standard mentality of the society twitteratis, and social media nazis threw hate all around, which included hate of all degree.

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Majority of the hate spewed online is indescribable and is better not be shared to further add dirt to one’s hands. This is what ‘Loug Kia Kaheyngay’ looks like. These snippets define how the society, the ‘LOUG’ surrounding the families make sure that you don’t end up living a life that pleases you! This phenomenon lets you, me and every other person down each time we stand up to something for ourselves.

Mahira Khan is at a place where the hate does affect her, but at this degree where she is, she had personally shattered all the ropes that tie her down. She undoubtedly received never-ending support from the fans, friends from the fraternity, and wellwishers from India that stood up to the misogynist and double-standard society putting down women from doing what they feel like doing. The fact being that majority of the hate received came directly by women who hated her for bringing shame upon herself. For doing what? A smoke? Should they be getting the hate, as well?

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Coke Studio stuck between the Love & Hate Brigade

What’s music to you? For me, it’s something that I feed on when I’m happy, sad, excited or just bored. My music often defines what and how I think and take my decisions. It’s actually quite a lot for me and definitely for many. Coke Studio had been the biggest hope since a decade that brought back classics the younger generation never knew existed, revamped the entire South Asian music scene with some of the biggest fans resting in India.
Surprising enough, with a mega opening act the 10th season seems to have gotten stuck on an island surrounded by the super energetic waves of both positive and negative criticism. There’s more of a battle taking place across social media with KOLs, music enthusiasts and people who simply cannot resist the power of Coke Studio taking their opinions to another level!

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Why is that there’s so much disparity for this season? Starting off from the tales of Nepotism towards selecting singers that weren’t found too apt for the covers and, aahh…yes! Covers, ‘why does CS10 believe in opting for covers rather than producing originals’. There are too many tales to tally and I on the other hand just have a very basic opinion to not let the music die from the Pakistani industry once again. We have taken almost a decade to pick ourselves back again where the singles are making waves across. There’s always the good, the bad and even the ugliest (hear Sayoone) but there’s always a beauty to the difference of opinion that helps music aficionados to work harder and produce, richer!
All I’m afraid of is the time when Bilal and Faisal take off from CokeStudio with a broken heart like Rohail Hayatt 4 years ago. He said that he wasn’t but it was evident, he lost hope from the people for whom he created wonders for 6 whole years. Creations like ‘Alif Allah, Aik Alif, Bibi Sanam, Yaar Dadi, KirKir, Pyaar Naal, Aj Latha Naeeo, Jal Pari, Laila O Laila, Ishq Kinara where these are just a few that came from that 6-year long journey. For the hate, he received even from the Gems of the industry.

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Pakistan, criticise where it’s meant to be, say it out loud, but say it sanely. Your opinions make the judgment of many who rely on foreign opinions to try things out. Maybe you did take away the chance of someone actually enjoying a song that you didn’t like.

 

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You might know your music the way you hear it but you might not know the struggle behind its creation. You might say what sounds right to you, but you may be different than what the producers thought about their production!

Let music survive in Pakistan with your constructive criticism.

Local Facebook Food Groups or Biased Lobbies?

The power of Facebook groups is the same as the kid in the community, who has the ownership of the bat and the ball. Who gets to decide which kid gets to play and which doesn’t; who shall get to bat even after declared an out because he’s good friends with them. My most memorable experience with Facebook group admins started when I got blocked from a very famous Buy & Sell group that has now turned into a proper brand. Nevermind, the story’s the same throughout most prominent groups where the creators tend to not have any mercy towards their members and often show a very demeaning attitude towards the ones who tend to not fall in accordance with their set rules of not just the group but the society as well.

This recent incident where the creator of a very famous food group, SWOT’s (Guide to Karachi Resturants, Cafes, Dhabas, Khokas and Take-outs) commented on a genuine complaint made against a high-end eatery, posted by a member and pointed out that she couldn’t understand the rant since it wasn’t written according to her set standard of ‘English’.

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Calling out to the already distressed client that one cannot understand the complaint just because it had been composed bi-lingually? Which century are we living in? The era of the British. Pfft! The member quite innocently goes on to clear her point ahead, regarding the quality of service she had experienced at the eatery, etc. The argument further enfolded into a loyal vs. virgin customer. We all may agree to it, customer service is never dependent on the number of times you have visited an eatery! It is something that either wins or loses you a customer. The creator of SWOT later very beautifully responded to all the hate and critique received in various groups and forums that hit directly towards her disrespectful attitude.

19665530_480741708940274_3649155634667883328_n.jpgThe reply speaks for itself and needs no further explanation for ‘there are plenty of groups where the likes of you are welcome’, who really determines the ‘like’? There might be many, anxiously waiting outside to get into the group, sad enough, they remain unaware of the way this and many other groups are maintained with the sole monarchical mentality. Similar, biased incidents have happened in the past when a group of bloggers (swoggers) on the SWOT panel; a) refused to attend an event Pakistan Ka Dastakhuwan  (#PKDKhi) because the management had to switch the location from Clifton to Gulshan e Iqbal and b) spent the rest of the time bashing against the entire event without even having to attend it. Luckily, they were pretty much roasted online for their unnecessary attitude and reactions.

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There’s always respect for creators, admins and moderators for having the energy and temperament to get along with the daily nonsense that keeps on taking place within the group. But it never really gives them the power to demean, disrespect or dishonour a person on the basis of how they draft their review, rant, complain or query. These groups provide a greater avenue for foodies, critiques and silent readers who secretly build their opinion based on the reviews shared online.

How would you react if provoked for having used a skill that hadn’t been mastered by many around you?